Image credits Photo by Jonas Leupe on Unsplash. Through his work he has revitalized relationships, brought together lost loves, and witnessed clients find their soul mates. When a guy acts rudely in an effort to control the situation, thats when his behavior becomes obvious. If a guy likes you one minute and is ignoring you the next, all things considered it could just means he "really really really" likes you! That means when you step on a guys' masculinity things are bound to get wonky pretty quickly most times. By Ellen Nyland Written on Nov 16, 2021. Sometimes people might act rude because they get jealous of the time and attention you give to others. Perhaps they find the courting stage thrilling but see the stable relationship phase as boring. He could have a variety of other things going on in his life, and the idea of committing to someone, even casually, does not jive with him. You might be ready for that but he might not be. Women want to talk about their feelings and men want to push them away as far as they can. If a guy doesn't feel the same way after knowing you like him, there's a chance he will act indifferent or oblivious about the information. February 8, 2023, 12:44 pm, by More:How To Talk Dirty To Him So Hell Do ANYTHING You Want. He just needs time and space before he can figure out whats going on with them. try to show compassion. Dealing with men my whole life 4 brothers, going to school with only guys, 3 sons plus hubby, and working in a male dominant industry I can say for certain that men have different coping mechanisms when it comes to the emotional side of life. Are you the kind to rattle off a list of specific, unrealistic things you want in a man? Some reasons why guys act distant when they like you are: He thinks you won't be a match . Its his very awkward attempt to create an emotional spark. 1) He's not actually ignoring you The first explanation that we need to eliminate from the list before going any further is checking that he really is ignoring you in the first place? Here are five common, yet subtle, waysa man hints that he likes you (without ever actually saying it): One of the signs a guy likes you is his level of seriousness. Working out what that exact message is will depend on your individual circumstances. If youve only recently started dating (meaning its early in the relationship) then it might just be that hes not interested in you. Or theyd go out on a Saturday night and try to pick up girls. Uh-oh. He does not want to feel the pain he felt when he was in a relationship before. It sounds immature, but unfortunately, some guys feel the need to act tough in front of their mates. Among the final signs that he loves you is one of the most confusing: He doesnt initiate physical contact. Another reason women act like they don't like you is because they are not feeling sexually attracted to you yet. He acts the same. Don't tell the guys this, but when a guy feels cornered, they act like a cat in distress. However, if you can discover his fears then there might be a way to help him grow. It could be that he's not ready for a relationship as he may be getting over a past relationship, or he might just not be looking for anything serious. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. +1 y. Immature women will be rude to a guy they like because they don't want to be vulnerable and just make it known they like the guy. Even if you are a girl, dont panic! There is an easy fix for this one, you can make it very clear to him that youre available and you might as well tell him being rude isnt the best way to get to know you! Here are 6 reasons for why he is acting distant all of a sudden: 1. In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation. Creepy. Perhaps an ex abused him or cheated on him, and he cant get that terrible experience out of his mind. Well, show him that wont happen when hes dating you. Be relaxed and chat to him like he is your buddy. It scares him what others will think of him when they see him with you. It solidifies the relationship. Or perhaps he has other issues going in his life. Is he actually trying to be funny or does it genuinely seem like hes being mean? He will feel that doing so would be asking too much as it would force him to grow up and start taking life more seriously. It's easy to see how this happens. This might be a tough pill to swallow, but all guys get the jelly when someone else shows interest in the girl they have their eye on. If you can love someone who is down on himself, then it will give him more confidence in himself and the relationship. Most guys believe that if you look 'thirsty' or desperate to a girl then it's a turn off, but if they act like they aren't interested then apparently it makes them look more worthy? But now that he is spending the majority of his time with you, hes losing that sense of masculinity that he is so used to. This goes back for thousands of years when the male/female roles were set up. If youre interested in a guy and you see some obvious signs they like you, too its confusing when they act rudely towards you. What's more, you might even notice his infidelity when you are both outdoors. 1. Therefore, he will try to mess things up and give you the cold shoulder if you try to get close, so you don't realize the extent of his immaturity and run away. He feels that sharing his true feelings might ruin your friendship with him. Here are 11 of the most common reasons why guys act rude when they like you: Probably the most common reason why a guy might act rude when he likes you is that he could be shy and not sure how to approach you. Maybe he likes you but thinks that you like him for the wrong reasons. . They lash out with everything they got, and language is the first thing they use, combined with the body language they know that will piss the partner off. There is always a reason for a guys actions, Im sure youll get to the bottom of it and everything will work out the way its meant to be! If you can see past the initial behavior, you might find that hes actually a sensitive, emotional guy with a lot to give people when he lets them into his circle. So dont let him put you on a shelf (or take you off of it), but understand that he might not be the one for you, and he doesnt want to hurt your feelings. Some guys struggle with giving up control, so they would rather give you mixed signals and make things confusing for you. Maybe he's right. If he really is, he will let you know and he will stop messing around. Don't bring up the event and refuse to go along with the narcissist when they bring it up. Most guys fall in this category, according to Walsh. This is probably brutal to hear, but many arent great at communicating their feelings so sometimes they dont tell the girl that this is the case. The kicker is that a man will act distant when he doesnt feel like your everyday hero. This may turn awkward if youre giving him the green light (So, here are my breasts). This shows that youre open, youre comfortable, and youre not afraid to like him back. They are scared of their feelings. Roselle Umlas Why do guys act cold when they like you? January 31, 2023, 5:52 am, by I think you need to stay far away from this guy. In other words, women look after the "soft" side of life, and men are expected to embrace the "hard" side of life: war and death. It's not always you or your fault. When the line starts to build, the service slows down. It might look like he is confident with himself, but deep down, he might be scared that he will do something wrong. If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach. I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was. 1. He might think that if things become serious, he will get hurt, so he reacts with hostility or rudeness. In other words, they shut you out and don't seem to care how that hurts you. Another way this might manifest is through hyper-masculinity meaning he might act like an oddly macho, macho man. If you buy them, we receive a small commission from that sale. If you would like to learn more about the hero instinct, check out this free online video by the relationship psychologist who coined the term. The language they use can be rude and offensive to certain people. If a guy feels this way about you, it means that he might feel vulnerable in a relationship or in being open with people. A lot of times, guys are defensive around girls that they like, but they feel that this girl doesn't like him back. And the last thing they want is to be rejected (its terrible for their ego). 7. The term was first coined by relationship expert James Bauer, who discovered what he believes to be the key to a happy relationship: triggering the hero instinct in men. Why do guys act like idiots and jerks all of a sudden? This didn't happen all of a sudden. If you havent heard of Relationship Hero before, its a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations. Men often go into masculine mode (the safe, traditional gender role)when they arent sure what else to do. He talks about me a lot and gets embarrassed when people say they ship us. If hes acting distant then he may not be as forthcoming with his replies as you like, but thats okay. He thinks its better to stay away and keep himself safe. What if you notice his interest and reject him? He doesnt know how to deal with his feelings for you, so he pushes them down and acts like he doesnt care. Instead, men choose women who they are infatuated with. Although this could be that he's nervous, there's also a good chance that he has a huge crush on you. This might mean he needs some space to figure things out, or it may be that youre able to help him through this tough time and become closer than expected. Even if youre giving him the green-light, he may still fearrejection or ruining the chance at a real connection. If a guy has been hurt in previous relationships, he might act rude as a way of protecting himself. Why do guys act rude when they like you? (Unless you do, in which case one would have to wonder why you care that he likes you or not.). Jelena Dincic The theory claims that men want to be your hero. Consider this article your own personal man-behavior decoder ring! Your email address will not be published. These women stir up a sense of excitement and desire to chase them. ", The content produced by YourTango is for informational and educational purposes only. Non-communicative men do their own thing without acknowledging your feeling or wishes. A cocky attitude may in itself tell a woman a guy has the goods, and lying can cover the rest. You might conclude hes not attracted to you, or that youre not his type. Despite popular belief, men dont always jump at the chance to have sex. Like me on Facebook to see more articles like this in your feed. If you can be patient and understanding, then he might be able to build a relationship with you. One of the biggest and dumbest reasons of all for guys acting differently around their friends is that they don't want to be seen as "whipped". He doesn't want a relationship A guy might want to be intimate with you, but he is not ready for a relationship. Look down, look up, look to the left, look to the right, just don't look at the camera. by You dont know if hes beating himself up about it after. You're wondering, "Why do guys act rude when they like you?"When you're interested in a guy and you see some obvious signs that he likes you too - it's confusing when he's being rude to you.It's not uncommon though, being rude or moody is a way some guys manage their feelings.Here are 11 of the most. Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. Theres actually a fascinating new concept in relationship psychology called the hero instinct. He might also think that if youre moving too fast, you might just want to find the best guy and leave them in the end. Worthiness is largely a mindset, and if he doesn't have it, then he doesn't have it by his own choice. Its actually more common than you might think. When a guy is interested in a girl he likes, he becomes overly protective over her because he doesn't want any other man to flirt or get close to her. Rather than put himself out there and risk the chance of getting hurt, he would rather hurt you instead by sabotaging the situation. He puts you down. This may be tough to hearbut you need to give the guy some space. Support his other passions in life. It doesnt matter how much you love someone. He might also get jealous if he is afraid of losing you to someone else. One of the obvious reasons why a guy may ignore or act disinterested in you is because he feels you are too good for him. According to Jones, someone's reason for ghosting you likely has little do with you at all. Here are 11 Reasons! In fact, giving him space doesnt mean not seeing him, either. Guru Age: 32 , mho 71%. It could be that the guy you like is already in a relationship and cant act on his feelings. Sometimes, you practically need a decoder ring to figure out whats going on. Tall, dark,andboastful? Maybe she wants to meet in public first, as Tinder dates often do. If you take it easy with him and give him space, hell come around quick enough. However, this is completely wrong. Something that makes most women go "Really? Its an old-fashioned way of thinking to be honest, but some guys still believe it works and it helps them feel more secure. HubPages is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. Take him at his word. There are many reasons why guys act distant. If hes slow to respond to your advances, it might simply meanhes afraid of moving too quickly and ruining the relationship. Maybe he's been rude the entire time but you didn't perceive it that way. After he has recharged his man batteries, hell likely come around again and stop acting so damn distant. There are a variety of potential reasons why a guy might ask you out and then disappear. A rude driver cuts in front of. If you can be open, then he might get closer to you and start to share his feelings. Maybe he's afraid of humiliation, afraid that you'd make fun of him, afraid that others would think him a loser for being outwardly rejected. So think about it: Maybe he does like you. Maybe it just seems to him that you want something that he can't provide. 7 Signs He's Acting Like A Jerk To Hide Deep Emotions, 4 Reasons To Marry An Emotionally Complex Man (As Written By One), 4 Brilliantly Subtle Ways To Bring Him Emotionally Closer To You, 17 Tiny Things Women Can Do To Make The Man They Love Feel Big & Manly, 5 Words That Are Infinitely More Romantic Than Saying 'I Love You', What To Say And Do When He Says He Feels Pressured, How Men Deal With Emotional Pain (And How They Can Handle Their Feelings Better), 3 Mind Games The Most Insecure Men Play In Relationships, If Your Guy Does These 7 Things, He's Playing You For A Fool, 16 Warning Signs You're Dealing With An EVIL Person, The EXACT Moment Men Fall Out Of Love With Their Partners. Men dealing with inner pain often have no filter. He is acting distant because thats what feels right to him. That can be enough to make him keep his hands to himself just a little while longer. Try to avoid spending time thinking about whether or not he is interested in you. They Don't Want to be Seen as "Whipped". Pearl Nash Lachlan Brown 1. Unlike other people, scene kids care about two parts of their bodies: their eyes and their hair. You start off being smooth, calm and collected, trying to win over the person's attention. Women are emotional creatures, and losing their emotional connection in a relationship can really affect their life and relationships. The truth is that trying to convince a man or show him how amazing you are always backfires. 24+ Clean Comebacks for Bullies Thatll Make You Smile, Is My Boss a Narcissist Quiz (10 Questions to Help You Find Out!). If a guy sees you with another guy or hears from someone that youre in a relationship, he might start to act rude toward you. Acting distant is a form of defense mechanism designed to protect himself.